Sometimes, especially when I’m stressed or
enduring monthly hormone poisoning, my desire for the good ol’ days of takeout is almost unbearable. In my romanticized memories, ordering Chinese takeout was a carefree experience: we just picked up the phone, ordered a pile of food, and 45 minutes later, we were inhaling spare ribs, cold sesame noodles, and fried rice. In reality, I did all kinds of mental gymnastics to make it OK with myself to overeat foods I knew weren’t doing me any favors, and when the gluttony was done, I made all kind of promises to myself about how I’d “start over tomorrow.” It was a painful, shameful way to consume food, and sometimes, I wish I could travel back in time and hug that girl.
But thanks to guidance from people like Melissa and Dallas at Whole9Life and Robb Wolf, brighter days are here. And the phone call+binge days are long gone… but dang it! if I don’t still want cold sesame noodles sometimes. And hell yeah! isn’t it great that julienne peelers exist in the world?!
I hope you like this version of cold sesame noodles made with cucumbers (instead of egg noodles), tahini, sugar-free sunbutter (instead of peanut butter), and no sugar. I guarantee you won’t miss the starch or the sugar.
Cold Sesame (Cucumber) Noodles
This takes about 10 minutes to make and creates 2 generous servings for dino-chow eaters or 4 side servings for regular people. You can also turn just one cucumber into noodles, use half the sauce, and save the other half of the sauce for tomorrow. Trust me! You’ll want to eat it again soon. Make this into a complete meal by shredding cold, cooked chicken on top or serve alongside grilled chicken or shrimp.
1 teaspoon sesame seeds
1 tablespoon tahini
1 tablespoon organic sunbutter (sugar-free)
1 teaspoon sesame oil
1 tablespoon coconut aminos
1 tablespoon rice wine vinegar (now Whole30-approved!)
1 tablespoon water
1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1/4 teaspoon powdered ginger
1 scallion, dark green part only, thinly sliced
1. Heat a small saute pan over medium heat, then toast the sesame seeds until light brown, about 2-3 minutes. Set aside to cool.
2. Peel the cucumbers, then turn them into noodles with a julienne peeler. Place in a large bowl.
3. In a small bowl, mix the tahini, sunbutter, oil, coconut aminos, vinegar, water, red pepper flakes, garlic, and ginger with a fork until smooth.
4. Pour the dressing over the cucumber noodles and toss gently with a rubber scraper until evenly coated. Mound on a plate and sprinkle with the sliced scallions and toasted sesame seeds. Enjoy the first creamy, nutty bite, then ask yourself in wonder and glee, “Noodles! Who needs ‘em?!”
NOTE: Because this includes two kinds of seed butters, it’s higher on the omega-6 side of the world, so you don’t want to eat this as a primary fat source every day. However, as long as you’re getting your coconut oil and/or EVOO and fish oil the majority of the time, this kind of thing is OK occasionally. Enjoy it with a light heart!
Hungry for more paleo-ized Asian takeout favorites?
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